


meteoric

by Ericine



Series: Lush [1]
Category: Star Trek: Discovery
Genre: (basically it's college), College, Cuddling & Snuggling, Discernment, F/F, F/M, Femslash, Femslash February, Getting Together, Outer Space, Party, Platonic Cuddling, Roommates, Starfleet Academy, Truth or Dare, Vulcan zippers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-21
Updated: 2018-05-06
Packaged: 2019-03-07 17:34:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13439796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ericine/pseuds/Ericine
Summary: Before they were Captain Georgiou and Commodore Paris, they were just two cadets at Starfleet Academy. And they fell in love.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [R_S_B](https://archiveofourown.org/users/R_S_B/gifts).



> Oh man. How do I even start with this? Basically, R_S_B, Pixie, and cosmic_llin were posting all of these amazing headcanon and writing amazing fic, and I decided that I wanted to explore how these two ladies get together in the first place!
> 
> Some notes, because this is a pretty far leap off what's given in canon:
> 
> 1\. Commodore Paris = Afsaneh, because this is a thing that R_S_B established, I think? I've adopted that.
> 
> 2\. I also realize that we know these characters by the names they take when they get married (though Georgiou is established in _Desperate Hours_ as being divorced and keeping her ex-husband's name). Holding back on giving Philippa a maiden name because maybe Trek will give us a canonical one?
> 
> 3\. Nicknames courtesy of...Tumblr? Was it Pixie who came up with them? Idk. I kept them, seemed to fit in with the casual, young feel.
> 
> 4\. Cornwell and Lorca are in an established friends with benefits situation that starts...almost immediately in the Academy. They're That One Couple, you know?
> 
> 5\. This is probably going to turn into a tropetastic romance getting-together story, so get ready for all your classic fanfiction favorites hahaha.
> 
> 6\. Title inspired by Kygo's "Stargazing," if that gives you any indication of the feel I'm going for hahaha.

Philippa - or Pippa, as her fellow cadets have begun to call her - firmly holds that the worst day of finals is the third-to-last, when she’s fatigued from the first handful of tests and yet still has so many more before her. She can’t even say that she’s ‘almost finished.’ She just has to keep going.

She affords herself the smallest of comforts now - pouring over her notes from the softness of her bed instead of the hard, unforgiving library seats. She’s maxed out on coffee right now, and so she has no choice but to wait for the last caffeine crash to clear before she starts to feel awake again.

It’s well past dinnertime, and she estimates she’ll be up a handful of hours after midnight.

She sighs and closes her eyes for a moment, feeling the combination of relief and burning behind her eyelids that means she needs to sleep.

Things can only go up from here.

It’s a mistake the moment she thinks it, because she drifts off a little bit, then.  


“Kat, we’re losing her,” Gabe says, and Pippa opens her eyes to find that she’s not sure how much time as passed, but Katrina and Gabriel had definitely both been sitting quietly on opposite sides of the room when she closed her eyes, studying like she was. And now they’re both sitting on Kat’s bed, with Kat practically in Gabe’s lap. Their books are still strewn on the floor.

“Oh, sorry. Thanks for waking me.” Pippa smiles a little and slides off the bed, reaching for her bag. She can take a hint. “I’ll just, uh, get some more coffee.”

“Oh, Pippa, you don’t have t—“ begins Kat, then squeaks as Gabe pulls her into his lap.

“Thanks!” yells Gabe, as Pippa closes the door behind her, grinning in spite of herself.

There’s a slight chill outside, and Pippa realizes the moment she walks outside that she’s forgotten her sweater.

It’s three minutes from this door to the library door if she runs.

She’s around the halfway point when she realizes that there’s someone behind her. That doesn’t stop her from starting when she realizes who it is.

“Oh, Pippa, it’s you,” says Afsaneh. Pippa’s one-shouldered bag is banging into her side as she runs; Afsaneh’s perfectly-fitted backpack barely seems to bounce. She catches Pippa’s strides, the pieces of hair falling out of her ponytail looking styled though it’s one in the morning and quickly approaching day four of finals.

It’s not that she dislikes Afsaneh, though she has every reason to - they’re both taking the same classes. And though they won’t be asked to lock their decisions in until later, this choice set of coursework basically means both of them mean to be starship captains. They aren’t the only ones taking them - Gabe, for example, is taking them too - but the two of them tend to score around the same bracket. It’s not really jealousy she feels - more like a small desire to be Afsaneh, or to have a little bit of the put-togetherness the other girl seems to have.

Pippa would sigh, if both of them weren’t unconsciously speeding up their pace. She doesn’t pay too much mind to these thoughts of hers, but they do pop up from time to time, and they don’t need to pop up when she has a triple day of exams tomorrow: intro to engineering, xenolinguistics, and warp theory. “Hi, Afsaneh. You’re up late.”

“Touché,” says Afsaneh, unmoved.

They continue to run together to the library doors, each trying to hide the fact that they’re now all-out sprinting. Luckily, Pippa’s almost sure that she’s more stressed and less rested than her counterpart, which means that she has much less to lose. She reaches first and opens the door for Afsaneh.

Afsaneh raises an eyebrow. “Thanks.”

Now, they’re both inside, and it makes sense for them to part ways, but the first floor of the library is filled with their fellow cadets, and they’re going to have to walk in the same direction for a while, looking for places to sit. Pippa feels a little uncomfortable.

They navigate the floor together, Pippa sneaking a quick look over to see if Afsaneh’s ponytail still manages to look as good in the light as it did outside.

It does. How is that possible?

“So, warp theory tomorrow?” Pippa pipes up. There are really no free tables. They might have to go to an upper floor together. Maybe she can try a different floor. Or excuse herself to make some of the better-than-usual coffee the library always has lying around.

The library is huge, and they’ve fallen into a pattern by now - Afsaneh scans the left side, and Pippa scans the right. Afsaneh also takes in the back to make sure no one’s gotten up since they’ve passed. Pippa peeks behind shelves into the parts skipped by a regular sweep.

“You’re studying for that?” asks Afsaneh, with a sideways glance.

Pippa frowns. “Well, it’s the easiest one, so that’s why I left it for last.”

Afsaneh furrows her brow but keeps walking. “I haven’t studied for that one either. Is that why you came to the library?”

“Kind of. It’s the only thing standing between me and sleep.” She wants to bring up the fact that Kat and Gabe are also standing (or lying, really) between her and sleep, but it’s not relevant. She’s used to coming back to the room late at this point, by the time the both of them are asleep and have gotten all of the sex out of their systems. It just happens to be finals week now, and finals are always weird.

Afsaneh stops. “Pippa—“

“It’s weird, us doing this together, isn’t it?”

“No—I mean, well, yes. But Pippa—you’re exempt from Tlol’s final if your average is over ninety-three percent. I’m guessing you haven’t gotten the chance to check your messages?”

The library is extremely crowded, and Pippa’s tired. She sits down on the floor in relief. “Are you serious?”

Afsaneh produces a PADD with speed that should not be possible, considering that she’s wearing a backpack. “See for yourself.”

Pippa laughs. “Oh.”

To her surprise, Afsaneh joins her on the floor. “I guess you can go to bed now.”

“I can’t,” Pippa tells her. Then, before she can ask: “What do you have left to study for?”

“Oh.” Afsaneh flushes a little. Pippa’s never seen that before. All it accomplishes is making her look like she’s wearing really nice rouge. “Nothing. really. I just couldn’t sleep. Sometimes the lights in the library make me tired. I was going to see if that would work."  


They laugh a little together. “Well, I can’t go back to my room now because my roommate’s getting laid,” Pippa admits.

Afsaneh looks interested. “Kat—Katrina? Is she still with—?”

“She’s not  _ with _ anyone,” Pippa says. It’s not like Gabe and Kat are a secret or that Pippa hasn’t been asked about it before. The answers come easily to her now. “It’s, uh, _chill_.”

“Ah. I stand corrected,” says Afsaneh, and if Pippa didn’t know any better, she’d say that she sounds impressed. “I, uh, I have a sleeping bag and an extra mattress pad if you want one.”

Afsaneh could not have sounded less enthusiastic if she tried. For the first time, Pippa considers seeing her as she sees herself: first year at Starfleet Academy, smart, but with no idea what the hell she’s doing.

“The coffee’s really good here,” she tells her.

* * *

It’s two AM in San Francisco, and unlike pretty much everyone else in the library, Pippa and Afsaneh have no reason to be awake. So they split a pot of dark roast with touches of cane sugar.

“My roommate’s never there,” says Afsaneh. “I think she might have dropped out, actually.”

“Fifteen percent drop out in the first semester,” Pippa cites, remembering the research she’d done when she was trying to get into the Academy.

“She might also just be doing to someone else what Gabe’s doing to you,” chuckles Afsaneh knowingly, looking at Pippa over the rim of her cup as she takes a sip.

Pippa closes her eyes and leans back. “I really don’t mind, you know? I’m almost jealous. When I want to relieve stress, I have to put on workout clothes and go to the gym. All they have to do is—“

They both dissolve into giggles.

“Common enough,” says Afsaneh. “She’s cool, you know. She wouldn’t mind if someone napped in her bed. It’s happened before.”

“Napped, not slept.”

“The sun comes up in five hours, and we’ve both each just had two cups. We’re going to end up taking naps.” 

Pippa shrugs. “Ah well, they’re not going to be done by now anyway.”

“Really?”

Pippa leans forward conspiratorially. “This is one of the reasons why I support this. The hookup is apparently that good.”

Afsaneh laughs. “Alright, so we’ve got nothing but sleep to lose. What do you do normally when this happens, if you don’t have to study?” At Pippa’s silence, she starts again. “Look, I know we have our weird—thing. This doesn’t mean anything. Nothing means anything during finals, so this is a—“

“Truce?” Pippa suggests.

* * *

Starfleet being what it is, there’s naturally a small observatory on top of the library. No one ever goes there because there are entire facilities on campus for looking at the stars, and they're within transporting reach of much better planetariums, but this one is symbolic - of learning or new horizons or something. It often doubles as a small art gallery (that also no one goes to). Afsaneh had honestly forgotten it existed.

She watches Pippa adjust the ancient telescope model with skill. “This is a hobby of yours?”

“Oh, come on,” says Pippa, mind only half on her words. “None of us are in Starfleet because we’re normal. We’re all giant nerds. I’m a nerd about looking at space. Now, what’s your favorite planet?”

Afsaneh laughs. “My what?”

“Your favorite planet. To look at? Or, I guess you could pick a star.”

“Uh, well, what’s yours?”

“Saturn,” Pippa says immediately. “Because of the rings. And it’s nearby.”

“Okay, so let’s look at that.” Pippa adjusts the telescope accordingly. “Why do you do this, anyway, when we can see things so many times better?”

Pippa gestures her over, and as Afsaneh moves the telescope in front of her eyes, Pippa answers: “It connects us to those who came before us. We didn’t always see things so well. Seeing things the way they did - I don’t know. I makes me feel like I understand them better - and history - and, um, myself.”

Saturn isn’t that magnificent-looking like this, but Afsaneh has to admit that the history, put into this perspective,  _ is  _ something. She pulls away to tell Pippa so and accidentally hits her hand with her own.

“Sor--”

“No, it’s--”

They laugh. Pippa’s hair, at any time since Afsaneh has met her, contains at least three colors, and the moonlight picks up on them in the darkness, giving her some kind of resplendent halo. She tries to pick out the colors - purple, red, and gold?

Suddenly, they’re both in the middle of a a pause that lasts a moment too long.

Luckily, Afsaneh recognizes it immediately and doesn’t let it go on a moment longer. “Thanks for this,” she says sincerely. She turns back into the telescope. “This is going to sound so ridiculous, but I think that might be the thought that gets me to go to sleep tonight.”

Pippa steps back and smiles her hesitant smile, one that Afsaneh has come to realize shields others from a surprising amount of confidence and ability. “It’s comforting, that the universe is always going to be that much bigger than us. It means there’s plenty for us to find. And also plenty to go around.”

“I usually find that terrifying,” says Afsaneh, picking up her bag.

“So what makes tonight different?”

Afsaneh looks again at Pippa’s moonlight halo. “Sleep deprivation.” She gestures for Pippa to follow her.

Pippa hesitates.

"Oh, sorry. You don't have to come."

"No, it's just--" Pippa shifts. "Do you mind if we run again? I forgot my sweater."

And that's how they end up running back to their dorm, arms linked, laughing because their huddling is not conducive to running _at all_.

Afsaneh can tell that Pippa’s a little uncomfortable sleeping on the roommate’s bed, even if Afsaneh hasn’t seen her in months, so she lets Pippa have her own bed and settles onto the other. Pippa dives under the covers, and Afsaneh tries not to laugh. It really had gotten a little chilly outside.  


It’s kind of nice having someone in the room with her. She’s drifting off to sleep when--

“Afsaneh?” She jerks audibly. “Oh, sorry.”

Afsaneh smiles and rolls over in the dark in Pippa’s direction, laying her head on her arm.  “It’s fine. What is it?”

“Thinking. If space terrifies you, why do you want to be in Starfleet? I mean, you don't have to answer if you don't want to, but it was just something you said...”

A week ago, she couldn’t have imagined spending time outside of class with Pippa, let alone them sharing secrets in the dark together. When Afsaneh closes her eyes, she can feel her own eyelashes against her arm. “Starfleet makes it less so.”

When she wakes up, Pippa’s gone, and they don’t talk about this night with each other until they’re both back from break.

* * *

Pippa considers herself to have two roommates at this point, so this gesture is one that she’s performed every day for weeks: she places three cups of coffee on the too-small table that splits their room from Kat’s side to Pippa’s side. The first, Gabe’s, is a chicory coffee. Kat’s blend has notes of cinnamon, vanilla, and something called praline. Hers, finally, is very finely ground, flavored with condensed milk.

She’d caught a few hours of sleep at Afsaneh’s, but she’d left when she sun woke her up - she didn’t want to overstay. And besides, she still has a couple hours to sleep. She downs her coffee quickly and lies down. With luck, it’ll jolt her awake in about half an hour.

“Pippa?”

It’s Kat, rolling over toward the coffee, pulling the sheet up a little higher over her chest. Pippa remembers when Gabe had started sleeping over. Both of them at least made an effort to put some clothes on after. Now they usually don’t, unless one of them has to go to the bathroom.

“Oh, thanks,” she says, eyeing the coffee. Pippa thinks it’s Kat’s turn to make breakfast. She can’t think right now. She climbs into bed. “Did you just get back now? I thought that the warp exam was--”

“I slept at Afsaneh’s for a bit,” says Pippa. “Can you guys make sure I wake up for xenolinguistics?"  


“Afsaneh,” grumble-groans Gabe, who’s just woken up. “As in--”

“Yeah. Her,” answers Pippa. She rolls over, refusing to entertain their curiosity. Tiny payback for what they've put her through all semester. “Sleeping now.”

Kat adjusts the sheet over her chest again and leans over to pick up her coffee. “We have time. You go back to sleep. It's my day for breakfast,” she tells Gabe, who rolls onto his back.

“But I thought they both--”

Kat sips her coffee. Perfect. “Yup.”

Gabe nods thoughtfully. “Interesting.”

“Yup.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kat has a secret. The solution, Pippa decides, is a girls' night out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Farzan as Afsaneh's maiden name...taken from R_S_B (thanks for correcting me!).
> 
> 2\. I totally invented the Vulcan zipper. But wouldn't it be nice? It's right up their alley too.
> 
> 3\. Thanks to everyone who listened to me going on endlessly about my ideas for this fic this whole week. <3

Pippa keeps Kat as a roommate for the next semester, though both of their marks are high enough to where they’d have a wider range of housing. The two of them have a system worked out, and Pippa wouldn’t admit it out loud, but she might miss Gabe, and Gabe and Kat come as a packaged deal.

For now, anyway.

She’s been feeling a little bad for not speaking to Afsaneh again after the night she spent in her room (and then left without saying goodbye), but she’s also not sure what to say. Or if there’s anything to be said. Maybe everything they said to each other would be invalidated by seeing each other in the daylight.

The longer she waits, the more awkward it becomes to say anything, so she doesn’t.

So naturally, they’re in the same combat techniques class for the semester. Pippa can recognize that perfect ponytail without Afsaneh even turning. Now, she’s going to have to say something.

She overthinks it a little, because she misses the next instruction. And then Afsaneh’s walking toward her with a wry smile.

“Lucky us, we’re the same height,” she says.

A quick scan of the room catches Pippa up - and also informs her that they’re both easily the shortest people in the class. “Partners,” Pippa says. Well, that made sense. They’d probably progress to fighting partners of different heights as the semester went on.

They each take a step back and assume a basic fighting stance. “Don’t think just because I’ve told you my hopes and dreams that this changes anything.”

She’s blunt, which is both comforting and unsettling at the same time. “I mean, if anything, it helps, right?”

They fall into the rhythm of reviewing what they learned last semester - step-strike-block-step. “What do you mean, helps?”

It had seemed obvious to Pippa. “We can push each other now to be better.”

Afsaneh shrugs. “Pressure makes diamonds.”

“Really? A whole universe full of rare, sparkly materials and you pick  _ diamonds _ ?”

“Nerd.”

“I told you that term doesn’t mean anything at the Academy.”

Afsaneh laughs. “I hope you have a better roommate now.”

They’re halfway through the warmup and switch directions so that Afsaneh is striking first now.

“Kat’s great. I kept them.”

“Them. So--”

“Yup. You?”

“I got my own room in a suite. There’s four of us sharing a bathroom, but this way, I never get kicked out of my own room.” Pippa rolls her eyes. “There’s a futon there, by the way, if you ever need it.”

Pippa shrugs, and Afsaneh uses that moment to push her jab a little farther than it should go for a warmup. Pippa dodges. “We have a system.”

“Uh-huh.”

She doesn’t know what makes her take the chance, but she finds herself saying it anyway. “You’d understand if you came by.”

“Uh-huh.”

* * *

“You  _ what _ ?”

It’s the third day of the semester when Pippa brings it up in passing. It’s not like they have a ton of work to do yet, so obviously Kat’s the only one in the room doing any, sitting in her bed trying to read ahead. She looks down at Gabe, who’s sprawled on the floor. “It’s her room too.” Her face breaks into a smile. “It was her room before it was your room, anyway.”

Gabe holds his hands up. “Not what I was saying. Pippa, I don’t mind if you have people over, and I’m very grateful for you letting me the second - albeit most excellent - roommate you never asked for. But Afsaneh Farzan? You had to pick the most self-righteous person in the entire class?”

Pippa had known that both of them knew Afsaneh, but she honestly hadn’t thought about it beyond that - or considered that what their impressions of her would be. “ _ Okay _ ,” she says carefully, sitting down. “Weigh in, then.”

“She thinks she’s better than everyone else because she’s always right,” he says, rolling his eyes. “Except she never answers unless she’s super sure about something, which is going to end up carrying little weight in the field. But, whatever, not that that counts for anything.”

“You didn’t like me when you met me,” Pippa points out.

“At least seventy-five percent of that was purely because you walked in on us. You can’t take that personally.” On the bed, the corners of Kat’s mouth turn up.

Pippa rolls her eyes. It’s an image burned into her mind forever: she’d gone for dinner the first night (the _first night_ , as in classes weren't supposed to begin for another few days) and come back just in time to catch an eyeful of both of them. It wasn’t that she didn’t think this kind of thing didn’t happen, but she hadn’t expected it to happen so  _ soon _ . Or so blatantly. Especially on her first night. “I told you I didn't mind if you stayed.”

“Which fixed a lot of my first impression of you.”

Pippa turns to Kat. “Do you have an opinion?”

“Just that you two are an interesting two ships in the night. I don’t have so many of my classes with her like the both of you do. Though--” Kat sweeps her arm out in a gesture that could be an affectionate ruffling of Gabe’s hair or a friendly swat - they toe their line like an art form, Pippa notes. “I guess after living with the  _ actual  _ most self-righteous person in our class, Afsaneh maybe seems like a welcome break.”

“Wow.” Gabe stands. “And with that, I’m going to the gym. And I’m going to Luna to visit my family this weekend, so I guess I’m just going to have the skip this get-together.”

Pippa waves. “Okay, but you know that she’s not coming today, right? She’s coming after class next week.”

“Do I  _ have _ to come?”

“I mean, it’d be good for the three of you to hang out, right? Don’t all of you want your own ships someday?” Kat asks. Gabe shrugs noncommittally and leaves. “That means he’s coming. You know that means he’s coming, right?”

Pippa laughs and hops on her bed. She tries to remember the last time the both of them slept in separate rooms when one of them didn’t have a reason to be elsewhere, kind of like Gabe and his upcoming family trip. She can’t remember.  “He doesn’t have to. You’re not obligated either, you know.”

“Yeah, but she’s coming to meet us, kind of, right? And I think I’m pretty bored with being the subject of everyone’s gossip. Meanwhile, you’ve somehow managed to turn your rival into a--”

Pippa doesn’t think any of this is gossip-worthy at all. “We’re  _ not _ friends.” Friendship is a thing that comes with time, not from one random night of looking at Saturn.

“A  _ dinner partner/sleepover buddy _ , okay? I mean, if anyone could have done it, it would have been you. And besides, I want to get to know Afsaneh better too.”

There’s something in the way that she says it, almost like she’s admitting a secret, that makes Pippa lean in a little closer. “Oh?”

Kat takes one more look down at her reading and sets it aside. “Look, I’m thinking about getting onto the starship command track.”

“Oh--”

“I know you can switch into it later, but I kind of want to do it now. It feels weird watching everyone else - and don’t say I’m taking too many classes, because I know I am. It would be so much more work, but I feel like--I just want--”

Pippa shakes her head. “Wait, Kat, no! That’s not what I was saying at all. What I was going to say was that it’s great for someone like you to want to command. Your perspective can only help. No one would ever say it, but there aren’t enough people coming to the command track from the sciences, let alone medical. And to have a psychologist commanding a ship--go for it, if that’s what you want.”

Kat nods. “I just--need another perspective. Don’t tell anyone, okay? Not even Gabe. I just want to figure this out for myself right now.” Pippa nods. “You’re so sunny, and he’s so direct. I don’t know much about Afsaneh, but I know that she’s different from you two. So maybe, if I talk to her, I get another perspective.”

Pippa smiles. “Okay.”

“You really can’t say anything to anyo--”

Pippa giggles and holds up her hands. “Okay, I swear!”

* * *

Just because she can’t  _ say _ anything about Kat’s discernment doesn’t mean that she can’t try to help. It’s still the first week of the new semester, so it’s not like there’s anything better to do but be social. Starfleet Academy’s art coalition is having a party. Getting Kat to go is pretty easy - partially because Kat likes people and partially because Gabe’s going to some family function.

Afsaneh, is, admittedly, a little harder. But Pippa’s determined.

“The last time I went to an Academy party, someone puked all over the front of my shirt, and I had to smell it as I ran all the way back to my room,” Afsaneh tells her as they jog around the grounds. “It was very _not_ enjoyable.”

“Okay, but that was last time. This is this time!” says Pippa. “Also, Kat’s great and would never puke on you.”

Pippa isn’t sure how Afsaneh manages to keep her face so composed while the rest of her is in motion. She raises an eyebrow. “And you would?”

“I’ll run interference! If anyone tries to puke on you, I’ll take the hit.”

“How noble. Pippa watch--”

Pippa only just dodges a blocked-off section of path. “Oh. Thanks.”

Afsaneh looks a little pained, even as she doesn’t break her pace. “You really don’t pay attention to what’s happening around you, do you?”

Pippa shrugs. “I would have figured it out eventually. And also, you didn’t even look. How did you know that was there?”

Afsaneh looks away. “I might have ran this path once through before you got here.”

It’s technically their lunch break now. “You ran it this morning? We already have to be up so early--”

Afsaneh shrugs. “I like being prepared.”

“Seriously, you’d get along  _ great _ with Kat. Just come. If you have enough time to be doing extra workouts  _ in the middle of the night _ \--”

“Oh, come on. The sun only came up about an hour later.”

“How do you not need sleep?”

“I went to bed early.”

“Okay, then look at it this way: instead of you getting up early and taking in the running trail, you’ll be getting a leg up on teamwork. For group projects and such. Because you’ll have to meet people.” At Afsaneh’s pause, she continues. “You can bring whoever you want with you.”

Afsaneh lets out a small laugh. “Okay, I’ll come. Am I supposed to dress up?”

“If you feel like it.”

“Do  _ you _ feel like it?”

Philippa grins.

* * *

Afsaneh decides against dressing up too much. She’s not in the mood and goes with one of her tried-and-true dresses for all occasions: a one-shouldered deep violet floor-length gown, with a few pieces cut out of the sides just to make things a little more interesting.

She shows up to Pippa and Kat’s door a little bit early. She’s planning on waiting a while before knocking, but the door opens, and it’s Pippa, looking a little harried.

“Oh,  _ good _ , Kat has this zipper that’s being  _ ridiculous _ because it’s a double, and I was just about to knock on some random person’s door--”

She pulls her inside and shuts the door behind her. Kat, in a strapless black dress, stands with her hands braced against the wall. Afsaneh is suddenly reminded of old books she’d read about Earth history, women being laced into those ridiculous corsets.

“Oh, hey, Afsaneh,” says Kat. “Thank goodness you’re here. It’s a double inverted zipper - you’ve got to help.”

“Double inverted” is a really bad translation of a Vulcan term that Humans notoriously mispronounce. It’s a bit of a modern feat of engineering that leverages static electricity, gravity, and three zippers (again, the “double” is a really bad translation that just stuck) to effectively hold up anything strapless, among other articles of clothing. A lot of people owned them, but Afsaneh didn’t, and this is the exact reason: it often took three to four pairs of Human hands to work the enclosure, which Afsaneh already considers two or three too many pairs to dress her own damn self. Vulcans apparently only needed one or two.

Still, she’s got years of experience helping friends of hers into their saris, so it doesn’t take too long for them to close the dress.

And it’s a really good dress, Afsaneh has to admit - short, almost sassy. She can tell that Kat thinks so too.

“Thanks for showing up early,” says Kat, sitting down to weave her shoes onto her feet, a twinkle in her eye.

Pippa’s hair - streaked with grey and pastel blue now - is half-curled. She turns back toward the mirror to finish it, glittering like light on top of water in her silver, prismy dress that just skims her knees and dips low in the back. “I swear I’m almost finished. We didn’t mean to keep you waiting.”

Afsaneh shrugs. “I might need a little while to warm up.”

“Well, lucky for you,” Kat says, standing, “Gabe’s left some of his mother’s stash of moonshine for us.”

“People still do that?” Afsaneh asks.

“I don’t know,” says Pippa, pausing to take the glass Kat’s offering her, “but Gabe’s family does.”

Afsaneh takes her glass from Kat warily. Any alcoholic beverage engineered by a Lorca, she gathers, is likely to fry her brain cells.

“Cheers!” says Kat. “Here’s to a great night.”

* * *

It is a great night. The art coalition DJ is really good and has a diversified set list. There’s glitter synthehol pong. The giant ball pit in the middle of the room doesn’t hurt either - nor does the fact that Kat’s bottled some of the moonshine and has it in her purse.

She’s not the only one who’s taken it upon herself to bring in her own refreshments, and when the party tips over from spirited into messy, Pippa - true to her promise - leaves the dance group she and Kat have found for themselves and steals Afsaneh away from her latest synthehol pong victory. 

She leads her out onto the balcony. “We shouldn’t be here,” Afsaneh tells her, a little giggly from the drinking and all of her victories.

“It’s allowed,” Pippa says, looking up at the night sky. She’ll take the stars in any form, really - even this one, the most basic.

Afsaneh takes her hand. “No, Pippa, I mean--”

Pippa looks over at her, then over to the couple making out behind her. “Oh.” She pulls Afsaneh farther away. She finds a clear spot against the building’s wall and leans against it. Her shoes are comfortable, but she’s been dancing for a long time.

Afsaneh laughs. “You really didn’t notice them?”

“No.” She realizes then that she’s still holding Afsaneh’s hand and drops it, looking back up at the sky. It’s almost clear enough to see some of the constellations, but she’d have to work at it - and maybe be in a slightly darker place.

“You really are inseparable from them, aren’t you?” The tone is chiding but only a little. When Pippa looks back at her, Afsaneh’s pointing up.

Pippa sighs, but she can’t hold back her grin. “Are you going to call me a nerd again?”

When Afsaneh smiles then, it’s the softest Pippa’s ever seen her look. She doesn’t know why that is or why she has the thought that it’s significant. “No. It’s just - you’re not always going to be surrounded by the infinite cosmos. It’s a bunch of smaller pieces. People. And worlds with problems.”

Pippa shrugs. “That’s the thing about the infinite cosmos. It’s always there, even if you can’t see it.”

“That’s a nice, romantic way of seeing the world.”

“Maybe. To me, it’s just the world.”

Things lapse into silence for a little, but Pippa’s learned that Afsaneh is good at breaking those.

“Should we go back inside?”

Pippa nods, but neither of them move.

Afsaneh breathes a laugh. “Okay, truth or dare?”

“Seriously?”

“Every terrible party game from when I was sixteen is being played in there right now, so why not this one too?”

“Fine. Truth.”

“Are Gabe and Kat exclusive?”

“No, because they’re not dating.”

“Yeah, but you can have exclusive...bed friends.” Afsaneh giggles at her own phrasing.

“Well, I guess so? But they’re not.”

“Have you seen any evidence that they’re not?”

“That’s two questions. Truth or dare?”

“Dare.”

The opportunity’s right there, so she takes it. “I dare you to ask Kat to coffee so that you can ask her all of these questions yourself.”

“We’re really bad at this game.”

“Well, it’s not like she’s hiding anything. And you two should talk anyway.”

“Why?” Pippa shakes her head. “Oh,  _ fine _ . I’ll do it when we’re not...moonshined. Moonshiny?”

“Moonshiny, definitely.”

“Truth or d--”

“Hey!” It’s Kat, a little louder than usual.” She’s walking toward them from the door. “I’m going to go hang out with Chris. You’re both good to go back together?”

“Yes,” answers Afsaneh.

“You’re getting coffee with Afsaneh next week,” answers Pippa.

Kat squints a little at that, then nods. “Okay, but can one of you remind me about it tomorrow?” She waves and turns. “Bye!

* * *

“She’s coming back.”

“She’s definitely not coming back.” Pippa unlocks the door to her room with her bioprint, steps inside, and kicks off her shoes.

Afsaneh follows, tentative. She probably should go home. “How do you know?”

“She’s the sleepover type - oh, not like that. You know what I mean. She’d rather crash on someone’s couch if it means getting to know someone a little better.” She sounds tired.  Luckily, Afsaneh can tell that Pippa’s perfected the art of only sonic-cleaning her head and face, just like her “You can take her bed if you want. She just cleaned the sheets.”

“Uh.”

“Okay, fine, get in my bed. There’s plenty of room.”

There’s  _ not  _ plenty of room at all, Afsaneh notes, as Pippa joins her a few moments later, having changed out her dress for some regulation sleepwear. After some awkward maneuvering, Afsaneh ends up on her side with her back squashed up against the wall.

Pippa rolls over to face her. “Maybe I should sleep in Kat’s bed. Do you want sleeping clothes?”

Afsaneh shakes her head, then realizes that Pippa can’t see her in the darkness. “No, that’s fine.” This dress is one of the most comfortable things she owns. She keeps it for a reason. “I’m comfortable.”

“You’re lying.”

“I’m not. Just - here, roll over on your other side.”

They’re effectively spooning now. It’s a gamble Afsaneh takes, seeing if Pippa won’t think it’s weird, so maybe it’s Pippa’s gamble to pull Afsaneh’s arm up and over her waist. And then she’s remembering them running from the library, huddled together, and how small and strong Pippa felt. She feels the same now - even softer, because she’s drifting off to sleep.

Afsaneh wonders if she plans this kind of thing - taking people out to look at stars, thus prompting some light and personal philosophizing. Afsaneh doesn’t normally care for that kind of thing, but it doesn’t really annoy her when Pippa does it. Perhaps it’s that Pippa lacks the naiveté she’s used to seeing in these kinds of people. Or maybe she just wishes she carried that same kind of faith in, well, everything.

Suddenly, it all feels a little too intimate. And too nice.

“Pippa?” she whispers.  _ Truth or dare _ , she thinks.

But Pippa’s quiet, and her breathing is too even, so Afsaneh just lets herself fall asleep with Pippa in her arms.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Morning after adventures.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Earns its rating this chapter! Perhaps not in the way you'd think haha.

Growing up, Philippa Georgiou’s best friend was Iman, who she met on a playground as a kid. Their class had just finished talking about family histories, and Pippa was all too happy to continue telling her family’s stories of exploration proudly. Iman had made a face at this and countered with stories of zir own - Iman’s family were fishers, now wildlife experts in the region. But they’d also had a short, brilliant period of piracy, which was the real detail that Iman had taken away from zir family’s stories.

This had led to an explorers vs. pirates battle on the playground, and by the time the pirates had decided to pledge their service to the explorers for the sake of the greater good, Pippa and Imanie had decided they were best friends.

This friendship continued all the way through high school, when their parents found each a staple at dinner. They were always group partners for projects at school, if they had anything to say about it, and about a year later, it became completely normal to find the other sleeping over for days at a time. (It took a whole other year for them to convince their parents that nothing was happening between them, not even a little, because things weren’t like that, but their parents trusted them.)

Pippa cried when ze had to leave - the whole family was getting relocated for long-term research on a tropical planet. Pippa made herself forget the planet’s name, because she didn’t want to know the place that was taking away her friend.

They still speak, of course, but Iman grew up to take the same path as zir parents and has been moving around the quadrant ever since. It was never the same as - well,  _ this _ . Waking up with a friend. Warm and safe and comfortable and--

Wait. _Iman isn’t here, is ze?_

The body wrapped around her is stirring enough to where Pippa figures she won’t wake this person up more than they are already if she turns over and - er,  _ reminds _ herself what’s going on here. Because she’s opened her eyes, and she’s not at Iman’s house at  _ Pantai Pasir Hitam _ , where she can see the sea turtles from her window. She’s in her bed at Starfleet Academy, so that means--

She rolls over as gently as she can - taking note that Kat’s bed is empty and unslept in - and finds herself nose-to-nose with Afsaneh Farzan, who is barely awake and now burrowing into Pippa’s neck.

“Class today?” Afsaneh mumbles, heat of her breath on Pippa’s collarbone.

Pippa closes her eyes and pulls her a little closer. “Not at all. You sleep as long as you want.”

Shifted comfortably, they lie there for a few seconds until Afsaneh says, “There was a party. How much did we drink?”

“Gabe,” says Pippa as an answer, because even though she doesn’t feel a hangover coming on herself, there’s definitely some heaviness in her muscles and behind her eyes.

“Ah, fuck ‘im,” Afsaneh replies easily.

Pippa giggles and involuntarily pulls Afsaneh a little closer. She’s soft. Pippa isn’t used to thinking of her as  _ soft _ . Afsaneh’s mind is sharp. Her body is strong when they work on combat techniques together. Her voice has an edge to it that Pippa can’t place. And yet, here she is, mumbling nonsense in her sleep in the room that Pippa shares with someone else.

That someone else isn’t here right now, but it didn’t really occur to them last night that Afsaneh was the one who didn’t have a roommate.

Afsaneh asks Pippa if she minds... _ something _ . Pippa doesn’t remember what it is or how she responds, because she’s drifting off to sleep - why shouldn’t she? The sun’s only begun to touch this room.

* * *

“Stay as long as you wan’,” Pippa says, and then her breathing deepens and slows, and Afsaneh figures at that point that she’s back asleep. Afsaneh ought to do the same - after all, there aren’t that many days she gets to sleep in. She usually spends her weekends getting a bit of a jump on the week, and it’s not like she’s ever been able to share a bed with someone before - really, really  _ share _ for the whole night, and it’s nice. She deserves this.

And then she tries not to tense up too much, because the entire night hits her - all of the divulging and drinking and whatever she was going to say last night that Pippa saved her from by falling asleep.

_ What is wrong with her? _

Slipping away from Pippa is easy enough - the woman sleeps like a rock. Or maybe they’ve only been asleep a couple of hours. She needs distance and to think.

Afsaneh backs up against the wall on her side, which gives her a little room for perspective. Kat’s not here and hasn’t come back, which means she’s probably still...wherever she ended up last night. Pippa is smiling at something in her sleep (Afsaneh wouldn’t be surprised if she dreams about nebulas when she sleeps either - someone like Pippa probably should be meeting magic wherever she goes). The shirt she’s sleeping in is all twisted, and Afsaneh’s gown (she’s hoping Pippa doesn’t think it’s too strange that she decided to sleep in her party clothes) has ridden up around her thighs.

She pulls it down.

She reaches up into her hair to find that it’s a matted mess - she doesn’t think she brushed it after the sonic. Apparently Pippa had, because she looks almost fairytale-like in her sleep, peaceful. Meanwhile, Afsaneh stares at her wide-eyed and very awake, vulnerable even though she can’t think of anything wrong she’s done.

She’ll slip out of the room, go home, get sleep, and figure out what to do with the rest of this mess later. Pippa wouldn’t be mad. Hell, Pippa’s  _ done this before _ . To her. A lifetime ago.

Why does this keep happening to them?

Afsaneh takes a deep breath and, with all the core control she can muster, focuses on sitting up without shaking the mattress too much.

Pippa’s eyes pop open.

“ _ I really need to pee _ ,” she says, to no one in particular. She’s out of the bed in seconds, positively gazelle-like, and sprints to the bathroom.

Afsaneh blinks a little, then moves, because here’s her opening, right here.

She’s at the door, slipping her shoes on, when she realizes that she’s lost an earring. Pippa’s still in the bathroom. She walks back to the bed to check for it.

She’s wondering if she should just stick the other earring in her purse and leave, worry about the jewelry later, when she hears a rough chuckle from behind her.

“Aren’t you a sight for the sun?” chuckles Kat, and Afsaneh  _ isn’t guilty of anything _ , so she doesn’t know why she feels her cheeks heating up when she turns around. Or why she feels like she’s been caught somehow.

“Morning. Nice night?”

Kat flops into her bed, shoes and all. “It was alright. Good enough, anyway. What happened here? Where’s--” She pauses and listens. “--ah, shower. Where are you going?”

She really doesn’t have any reason to be feeling this weird. “Nowhere. Uh, home. Sleep in my bed.”

“‘Musta been cute, the two of you,” grins Kat. “You had this like, girly pal thing going on at that party. I was almost jealous.”

“What?” Afsaneh glances behind Kat. She could always just leave. That wouldn’t be incredibly rude. That would be normal, right?

“Of your friendship,” says Kat easily. “I mean, I know, I have Gabe, right? But that’s kind of a different color of friendship, yeah? And he wasn’t there last night. I had to be social all on my own.”

It’s in-character for Kat, provided Kat always talked this loud and this fast. Afsaneh quirks an eyebrow. “You’re still drunk, aren’t you?”

“Oh, most  _ definitely _ , girl.” Kat props herself up on her elbows, and she looks so bright and alert that, honestly, if she hadn’t been talking, Afsaneh would have had no idea. “Gabe has the  _ good shit _ . In a lot of respects.” She giggles. “Anyway, you can’t slink out of here - you owe me coffee.”

“You want to go now--I wasn’t  _ slinking _ .”

“You’re a leopard, Afsaneh. You most definitely  _ slink _ .”

Afsaneh eyes her dubiously. “You’re sure you’re good to go?”

“I need eggs like no one’s ever needed eggs before. Come on, let’s go.”

* * *

A quick scan of the room tells Pippa that (1) Afsaneh’s gone, (2) Kat’s come back, and (3) Gabe is most definitely here, staring at her in her towel, because she’d forgotten to take all of her clothes into the bathroom with her and had to come out and get them again.

“Uh, hey.”

Gabe looks at her for just a moment longer, then leans down to continue unpacking his bag. “Right. So, can we just say that we’re at that stage of chill where we don’t give a fuck?”

Pippa holds back a sigh of relief. “I agree.”

“It’s not that I don’t think you’re attractive.”

“I know.”

“It’s not that you don’t think I’m attractive.”

“ _Wow, Gabe, seriously?_ ”

“I’m most definitely not your type,” Gabe says, zipping up his bag and shoving it under the bed. He doesn’t have too many clothes, but the ones he has fit neatly into one of Kat’s drawers. “You? Not really mine. But you’re attractive. I think people should tell you that more.”

Pippa rolls her eyes and walks over to retrieve the rest of her clothes. “Is this just a ploy to make me tell you you’re attractive? You’re very attractive, Gabriel.”

“Oh, come on! I made mine sound believable. Though--” He leans back, triumphant.

“Oh, what now?”

“I’d forgive you if you  _ finally got laid last night _ .” He raises an arm. “Up top!”

Pippa vaguely wonders if it’s the drinking, her own fatigue, or something else that’s making all of this so weird. “That didn’t happen.”

“So the room smells like Afsaneh’s going-out perfume, and her earring’s in your bed because--”

Pippa turns around, and sure enough, there’s the droplet. She picks it up, sets it on her desk, and sits down on her bed. “You know her perfumes, now?”

“You really don’t give me enough credit. I’m a very observant individual. It helps me in situations like this - and, ostensibly, in other situations that may come up when I’m in command.”

“She slept over. It’s not a big deal.”

“Where was Kat?”

“Chris’.”

He looks thoughtful. “Interesting.”

“How do you know she wasn’t here?”

He nods at the bed. “She was here, but it was only for a few minutes. Where’s Afsaneh?”

Pippa shrugs. “She was here when I went into the shower.”

“Nice, so she pulled a you and left in the middle of the night.” He glances at the window, where sunlight is pouring in. “So to speak.”

Pippa laughs and sits down on the bed. “Get dressed.” Gabe stares. “In something that’s not your traveling clothes.”

“You’re wearing a towel, Pippa.”

Pippa stands. “I know, I’m changing. But also, I’m attractive, so you’re welcome.” She picks up her clothes and takes them into the bathroom.

Gabe stares after her, chuckles, and then starts taking off his shoes.

* * *

Afsaneh pushes the cup of coffee in front of Kat, who pouts.

“I wanted eggs.”

“Well, you wanted to go somewhere where they really cooked them, so you’re going to have to wait a few minutes.”

Kat pouts and sips her coffee, which satisfies Afsaneh enough - she sits down and drinks her own. “She’s adopted you, you know. She’ll probably ask us in a few days if you can be granted guest privileges to our room, come and go whenever you want.”

The adrenaline must be kicking in where her fatigue leaves her lacking, because she laughs, bigger than usual. “What makes you say that?”

“It’s just the way she is.”

At Starfleet, it was possible to have never met Pippa and still know that she was a friendly person. “Yeah. With everyone.”

Kat shakes her head, closing her eyes. “Nope. She’s nice to everyone, but she picks her friends. There aren’t a lot of them.”

“So who else is allowed to come and go from your room when you’re not there?”

“Just one person, besides Gabe. Vulcan? I’m not sure. I’ve never seen her. She always manages to be there when we’re not there, I guess.”

A waiter brings them their food, and Kat eagerly begins working on her eggs, ignoring the rest of the plate. Afsaneh peers at her and wordlessly slides her plate over, slides her own eggs onto Kat’s plate, and slides the non-egg portion of Kat’s plate onto hers. 

“I’m honored, I guess.”

“You should be,” Kat says, between bites of egg. “Pippa’s awesome.” She pauses. “You’re also awesome, which is part of the reason why I wanted you to come to coffee with me, but she’s--I’ve known her longer.”

“You’re allowed to say you like her more than me. I don’t care.”

Kat examines her, then resumes eating. “You’re right. You don’t.” She stops, frowns at the eggs, then switches over to her coffee. “So why are you so weird about--” She stops and frowns. “Maybe that’s uncalled for.”

Afsaneh picks up her fork - she hasn’t yet - and pokes at the cheese on her plate. “This situation is already weird enough. Just say it.”

“Command. I want it.”

“Why am I so weird about command?”

It’s not what she was going to say, obviously, but she goes with it. “No. The reason I asked you here in the first place. I want to be on the early command track.”

“You’re counseling.”

Maybe that’s what Kat was expecting - she looked like she had been bracing herself for something, and she’s taking the hit now. “And I can’t be the captain of a ship too?”

“Huh? No, that’s why you should do it. Infinite diversity. There aren’t enough of you.”

Afsaneh crosses her legs and begins work on the shredded potatoes on her plate, so she misses that Kat’s looking at her with stars in her eyes.

* * *

“How did you know I was here?”

Kat and Afsaneh’s breakfast plates have long been cleared. Afsaneh’s sitting alone with her third cup this morning, somehow still looking regal in last night’s clothes, when Pippa slides into the chair across from her. “Well, I remembered that Kat made a coffee date with you, and Gabe said that if she had been at Chris’ she probably still would still be drunk. And both of us know that Kat, when drunk, loves eggs and tackling her to do list. So either you were together here, or you’d gone home.” She grins. “This place was first on the list.”

“My place is closer to your room.”

“Gabe and I went for breakfast. He’s been gone from home for a few hours and is already missing the food.”

“Do you usually get meals with him?”

“Do you usually get meals with Kat?”

Afsaneh laughs. “Why do you always get me into such weird situations?”

“They only get this weird when I’m with you,” shrugs Pippa. “So maybe it’s you.” Her smile breaks into a yawn, and Afsaneh’s yawning too and pushing her cup of coffee across the table. Pippa takes a grateful sip.

“Kat and Gabe went back?”

Pippa nods, smiling. “I give them two hours, three hours tops until they pass out.

They’re not technically required to be in uniform when they’re out like this, but Pippa had changed into one, just leaving her hair down. The light catches it prettily, dancing off the warm, gold insides of the cafe and reflecting her eyes.

And it could very well be Afsaneh’s body fighting to maintain homeostasis in the weird state of not-sleep she appears to exist in only when she hangs out with Pippa and her ridiculous roommates, but whatever anxieties she’d felt the day before melt away, as does her trepidation over asking what she does.

“Three hours is a long nap. My room’s free.”

Pippa gently lowers her head to the table. “I thought you’d never ask.”

* * *

“Oh my god, Gabe,  _ Gabe _ , fucking do it, don’t  _ fuck with me _ \--”

She spreads her legs wider under his mouth, just a fraction (he’s holding her hips in place), and her foot hits an annoying corner of the sheet. She kicks it away.

He lifts his head to look at her, hungry but still playful. Frustrated at the lack of contact, Kat jerks her head in his direction. “Fuck you,” she says, even as she smiles, even as she holds back the urge to just pull him up here and hold him in her arms (it’s not too hard - she’s so close, and he’s an arrogant bastard).

“Well, I’m trying to fuck  _ you _ , but someone keeps moving--”

Kat kicks the offensive blanket off the bed. “Done.” She’s slid a little doing so, and he’s got that fucking  _ gleam _ in his eyes.

Her legs are bent. He wraps his hands around them - just above her knees, and  _ drags her back to him _ , all the way, until his head’s level with hers. “Shoulda come with me. Shoulda left Pippa here to have her new friend all to herself.”

“You want to talk about this. Now.  _ Okay _ .” She makes a show of sitting up, and he pushes her back down into the bed with just the right amount of weight behind it, but it destabilizes him just enough for her to loop her leg around and flip him over. (He doesn’t balance his weight well - it’s one of the reasons Pippa loves having him as a sparring partner.) She reaches down to where she’s wet, slides her hand over herself, watching him lick his lips.

He groans when she wraps her hand around him. “ _ Fuck, Kat. _ ”

She leans down to kiss him, mostly because he shouldn’t be allowed to have a mouth that does the things it does. “I do things that don’t involve you because I want to. Also emotionally healthy. Also, I think Afsaneh and I are friends now.”

He closes his eyes and thrusts into her hand. “Yeah, I think Pippa and I are too."

She stops her hand, then starts again when he groans in protest. “Baby. You and Pippa are friends.”

“Babies don’t do this.”

Kat giggles. “Who’s holding whose dick here?”

He groans. “Okay, okay, fine. We are friends. But today she told me we were going on an adventure.”

She takes her hand away, just to slick it up again, and he makes a noise of protest. “That’s nice.” She returns her hand, and he reaches for her breasts, light thumbs over her nipples. She sighs. “That’s a--”  _ Sigh _ . “--new level right there. Good for you.”

“She’s totally into her.”

“Who?”

“Who do you think? Afsaneh-- _ oh _ .” She’s sliding her thumb over his head now, jerking down hard, slow back up.

“Really? Or do you just want her to have someone so you feel less guilty about us and her here?”

“I don’t feel guilty.”

“Okay, so it’s nice that you want her to have someone.” She leans down to kiss him again, and he kisses her back, running his palms down her sides.

Then he grimaces. “We’re not having a  _ moment _ , are we? I want her to get laid. I didn’t say that Afsaneh was  _ someone _ , you know?”

Kat kisses his nose (he grimaces again). “Too early to tell.”

“What does that m--” She sinks down on him then (finally), and they both moan. “Fuck, Kat.”

She leans down so that her lips are right by his ear. “That’s what I’m trying to do.”

* * *

Her Academy bed has possibly never felt so good. Afsaneh sinks into it, feeling all the tension in her muscles give way to sweet, sweet relaxation. Pippa climbs in after her and wraps herself around her.

“I’m never little spoon,” Afsaneh says.

“You are today,” says Pippa, nuzzling her neck for just a second. Then, she tenses. “I mean, unless you don’t want to be. I can roll over.”

Even that’s too much movement for her right now. Afsaneh closes her eyes and leans back into her friend. “No, it’s fine. There’s a first time for everything.” For a blessed moment, everything is silent and soft. “Can I ask you something?”

“Mmhm,” Pippa says, even as  _ that _ turns into a yawn as well.

“Have you always been this cuddly?”

“Yes. I had this friend when I was a kid, and I--I'll tell you the story sometime. You?"

“No.”

Neither of them sleeps alone for the next month.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kat and Gabe place a bet. Afsaneh clarifies things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I kind of stayed off this for a while because I felt that I needed to flesh out Afsaneh's character in my head. I think I have that now, but I know this kind of relationship might come as a bit of a surprise? I wrote a bit about it in [Familiar](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14317029), though. I hope it's not too jarring, because things will really start to pick up down the road now. :D

Afsaneh likes sex with Christopher Pike. It’s as hard and as fast as she wants, and there’s always a sense of finality to it. She’ll still be buzzing pleasantly as she gets dressed, but she feels good leaving right after. It’s something she and him have worked out as an art form.

Also, she hasn’t had him in a while. They have rules: only when they’re not otherwise engaged. But whatever he had with whatever girl there was (who may or may not have been Kat - Afsaneh doesn’t ask too many questions) is over now.

Usually, she likes that he doesn’t ask questions either. Apparently that’s not the case today.

“You’ve been quiet lately,” he tells her, when she’s got enough of her head together to sit up.

“You and I define ‘quiet’ very differently,” she says wryly, a bit hoarse. Her vision blurs. She lies back down. “I think I need water.”

“That makes two of us,” Chris chuckles. He leans over and produces a bottle from the floor. He offers it to Afsaneh, who drinks half of it and flops back down onto the bed. “And you know what I mean.”

Afsaneh blinks and waits to feel a little less dehydrated. “I didn’t know talking was a requirement for what we were doing.”

“Yeah, but usually we catch up before or after. I know next to nothing about your life right now. I kind of miss you.”

He’s right, of course. Afsaneh laughs. “Sorry. Have I been a bad friend?”

He finishes the water bottle and produces another one, because he’s always prepared like that. “Nope. Maybe just a preoccupied one. So where are you rushing off to after this? I know it’s not to study, because you don’t come here unless you’ve finished your homework.”

“Don’t put it like that - you sound like my sister.”

“Well, there’s a reason you’re in Starfleet and she’s pursuing something different,” Chris says. He lies down next to her. “So?

This is going to sound weird out loud. “I’m sleeping with Philippa Lee.”

Chris’ eyes shoot open. “Pippa.”

“Yeah, but not like - it’s not like this. Like we’re actually sleeping. Like sleepovers. Every night.”

“Okay.”

“Okay what? Don’t tell me it’s weird.”

“I didn’t.”

“So?”

“What does she think about us?”

“She doesn’t. I don’t tell her. It’s not like that. I don’t feel like I’m keeping anything from her.” She sits up again experimentally and finds she feels fine. “Do you tell people about us?”

“Never.”

“Good. Can I use your shower?”

Chris laughs. “Can I just give you blanket permission for my shower for now and all future times so you can stop asking?” Afsaneh rolls her eyes and gets out of bed. “You know, if anything changes with her--”

“--it hasn’t.”

“Okay, but if anything did, just tell me, okay?”

She gets it. She doesn’t have to dignify it with a response.

* * *

**_One year ago_ **

“Hey, are you okay?”

Afsaneh rolls her eyes so hard that it hurts her head a little. She’s crying in the library. Of course she’s not  _ okay _ . “Obviously not. Leave me alone.”

The voice sounds familiar. She looks up and finds herself looking at Christopher Pike - she’s pretty sure that’s his name. They have a handful of classes together, though he’s not much of competition, as far as she’s concerned. She’s got her eye on Philippa Lee and her unnaturally bouncy hair. Possibly Gabriel Lorca and his refinable edges.

This boy holds up his hands. “Sorry. What I wanted to say was that if you wanted someone to talk to, just let me know. I was, uh, sitting over there.” He gestures vaguely in some direction. “I could kind of hear you. I don’t know if you want to leave and go somewhere more, uh, conducive? To emotion?”

Coming from this guy, it almost sounds sincere. Oh well, what the hell? It’s not like much matters anyway right now. She stands and brushes herself off. “Okay, but you’re about to regret that offer.”

Over tea with way too much sugar and way too much milk - a comfort beverage - she tells him all about Sam (that rat bastard). How they’d dated for three years. How he’d made her all these stupid promises before she went to the Academy and how he’d lasted all of half a month of her being away before he cheated on her.

“And you know what pisses me off? It’s not how I found out, because I of course was going to find out anyway. He’s a moron, and morons make bad liars and secret-keepers.” She sees Chris holding back his laughter, but she doesn’t care. “It’s that now I have one more thing to worry about besides surviving here and how every move I make for the next three years determines my damn future, until I actually work in Starfleet and then every micro-move I make  _ there _ determines my damn future. It’s like, I thought I had this one singular area of my life together, and now it’s not. It’s just a mess like the rest of it.”

She stops and feels her pulse thudding through her. She’s so angry. She and Sam were at least good enough friends to be able to tell themselves this kind of thing was over, but he hadn’t even given her that. So she was done with him. Three years, gone.

“I’m going to ignore the fact that you’re laughing at me,” she tells Chris, “because I don’t fucking care. You offered to listen, so I’m going to tell you that that rat bastard’s basically the only person I ever dated. And now all of that seems stupid, trying to invest in someone when we’re apparently not adult enough to talk about our fucking feelings. You know he refuses to pick up when I video call him? I had to find everything out from Shanaz. Shahnaz is my sister. It’s like I need a fucking  _ intermediary _ to talk to the idiot who  _ actually proposed marriage _ to me? Before I came here. First, like, how the hell is that supposed to help us, us being so far away? And so young? And second, what if I had said yes? And then this moron goes and does this! Apparently  _ three years _ gives you  _ three fucking weeks _ .”

“Shit,” says Chris.

Afsaneh sips her tea, too angry to say anything she hasn’t already said in her massive rant to this complete stranger (stupid of her).

“I wasn’t laughing at you,” he offers.

“Okay.”

“You have a hell of a personality.”

Afsaneh’s eyes narrow. She still doesn’t really trust this guy. “Thank you. You ever been cheated on?”

“Yup.”

“Sorry about that. It sucks. What did you do to get over that stuff?”

“Joined Starfleet.”

“Well, aren’t we a couple of pathetic people in this cafe tonight?” Afsaneh quips, and drinks her tea vengefully.

* * *

That’s what they build their relationship on - ranting and drinking tea (and the occasional glass of wine). They don’t talk in class. They barely talk outside of class, except to do this thing. Sometimes she cries. Once, he cries. They just continue refilling each other’s glasses until one of them calls it off or it’s time to go home.

They don’t ask too many questions. She doesn’t know his parents’ names. He knows that she has a sister, but that’s because her sister is directly involved with Sam the Shithead (that’s his nickname this week). She’s invested so much of herself into a friendship that turned into a relationship that turned totally fubar. Why in the fuck would she want to do that kind of thing again?

“It’s like I don’t even have anyone to talk to that’s not family, because so much of my shit was said to him,” Afsaneh rants. They usually wait until they’re feeling on the better side of emotional to go for alcohol, even this weak stuff, but emotions can take a turn. It’s fine. She trusts him enough to let him see her angry and tipsy.

“You can spread that stuff out,” says Chris. “Talk to different people.”

“Yeah, but you’re the only person here I’ve met so far who doesn’t go around talking about everyone else’s business to everyone else in this godforsaken summer camp. And I don’t hear any shit about you, so who are you talking to?”

“People on Earth.”

“Well,  _ I don’t have those _ , so you’re stuck with me until I find some people here who don’t make me want to airlock myself.”

“You know that we’re not actually  _ in _ space, right?”

“Butthead.”

“Jerk.”

They laugh. Chris’ roommate is getting some kind of dual training program between here and Vulcan, so he invites her over on the days he’s not free. Afsaneh is trying really hard to be a private person, especially since her stupid emotions have a habit these days of spilling themselves all over the place. She confines them to Chris and his stupid room and his stupid stash of wine (and his growing stash of tea, which is gaining in quality due to her excellent taste).

Chris’ glass slips from his fingers, and they both reach to grab it at the same time. They keep it from spilling all over the floor but end up much farther into each others’ spaces than Afsaneh intended.

Afsaneh looks up to apologize and realizes she can’t remember the last time anyone kissed her. It must have been more than a few months ago, so really not that long in the scheme of things, but why can’t she remember?

Like he’s afraid of what will happen if he moves too quickly, Chris puts the glass down. “I’m sorry,” he says.

She doesn’t know why he needs to apologize. She’s the one having the weird thoughts. She scrambles to her feet.

“Afsaneh--”

“I have to go,” she says, and she leaves before he can say anything else.

* * *

A week later, he finds her in the library (maybe it’s because she hasn’t been seeing him but still wants him to know where to find her - she doesn’t want to think about this), leaves her a takeaway tea, and leaves. They don’t say anything.

* * *

A couple weeks of this later, she takes him back to the cafe. Partially because she’s feeling particularly heavy on her “nothing really matters” kick. Partially because she’s damn lonely without him.

“I’m not mad at you. I’m mad at me.”

“I figured,” says Chris, but it’s not condescending at all. “I don’t want you to be mad at you. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“I’m attracted to you. We can’t be friends.”

“I’ve been attracted to you since I met you, but we're friends. I don’t really want to be anything else. You’re a good friend, Afsaneh.”

“You can’t be my friend and be attracted to me. That doesn’t work.”

“I’m pretty sure I’m not the first,” says Chris, and Afsaneh can’t meet his eyes, because she’s blushing just a little, and also her insides can’t be trusted, with their spilling emotions. Stupid spilling. “Maybe I’m just the first who said something about it.”

Afsaneh closes her eyes tiredly. “I can’t handle it right now, whatever it is.”

“Okay,” Chris replies, little more than a whisper. They finish their tea in silence.

* * *

Still, Afsaneh’s stupid spilling emotions mean that the third time she’s up in the middle of the night crying, she stupidly messages him asking if he’s free to talk. He says yes, no questions asked.

Going to his room is a bad idea. Getting him to come to hers is probably a worse idea, but it makes her feel a little better. She doesn’t have to tell him to sit as far away from her as possible.

“You know what’s a stupid combination of emotion? Sad and horny,” says Afsaneh, and Chris’ corners of his mouth turn up. There’s something familiar in the way she’s ranting. “Like, useless. What the hell am I supposed to do with this? I’m just so angry. I’m angry that I don’t have other friends besides you.”

“You’ll make more,” says Chris. “Plenty of people want to be friends with you.” Afsaneh stares. “You talk just like an admiral.”

“Oh my god, I’m old.”

“Not what I said.”

Afsaneh stares hard at the floor. “Okay, so what if we...did?” She doesn’t want to say what. “I don’t want to date you.” She kind of doesn’t want to date anyone ever again. She doesn’t have the energy or the stamina to have her trust breached again.

“I don’t either. Look, Afsaneh, not everything always has to be everything. Sometimes it can just be...something.”

“You’re saying all these words, and there’s no meaning.”

“Do you know what I mean, though?”

Maybe she’s earned a bad decision or two. She’s made it this far without making one. “Would you ever lie to me?”

“What does that matter? You’d get the same answer, no matter what I was.”

This is supposed to be the time in her life she makes stupid decisions. Sam made his. Now, she can make hers. She rises and watches Chris’ eyes follow her as she crosses the room to him and sinks down into his lap. “And what am I, everything or something?”

Chris takes a deep breath, even as his hands have already risen to her hips. “Is this what you really want?” Afsaneh nods, and then she kisses him. It’s kind of weird, because she’s not used to it feeling like this - almost underwhelming, her mind almost sitting back and watching what her body is doing.

Easy, even, discarding her jacket and bringing his hands to her chest. She doesn’t feel all the way better, but she feels a lot more like she’s doing something about her situation than she did before, and that has to count for something, right?

“You’re something, Afsaneh,” he says, dropping his mouth to her jaw, then her neck. “You’re really something.”

* * *

**_Present day_ **

Even though Afsaneh has her own room (as she routinely reminds Pippa), they sleep in Pippa’s room more than half the time. Part of that is because they’re tired, and it’s easier for four people to wake up when they need to than just two. Part of that is because Afsaneh would never admit it, but she likes the company of Kat and Gabe just as much as Pippa does. They wake up together; they make their coffee and breakfast together (Afsaneh has now been added into the mix, which means someone else is making the drink three days out of four, which no one protests); they go to class.

It’s routine. It’s familiar, and it makes Pippa feel a lot like she did at home with her grandmother and nanny. They’re comfortable enough to where even Afsaneh hardly goes into the bathroom to change anymore, and Pippa likes this just like she misses Iman anyway. It’s funny - she’s never felt like she’s had to have company out in space. The stars put the same sense of profundity in her that they do in Afsaneh, but where Afsaneh feels profoundly  _ alone _ , Pippa feels profoundly  _ not _ . Sometimes (ironically), at the Academy - and on planet - there’s just too much  _ space _ .

She knows that not everyone's the same way, and she is mindful of Afsaneh. They can just fit side-by-side, so she always positions herself so. It’s Afsaneh’s decision, if she wants to be wrapped up in Pippa’s arms or snuggle into the other girl’s shoulder or just sleep with her forehead touching Pippa’s shoulder.

They can usually figure this out without speaking, though one time, early on, Afsaneh nervously asks if it’s unusual, what they share. And perhaps it is, for Humans. Pippa figures she hasn’t met enough Humans to tell for sure. But that’s when she tells Afsaneh about Iman, and she watches Afsaneh smile at the story and knows she understands (most people do, when she tells them this story). They don’t have to speak about it again.

Sometimes, if it’s the weekend and they don’t have anywhere to be  _ right then _ (there’s always something they can be doing to get ahead - more studying, more physical training, more meditation, more cultural immersion), and Kat and Gabe are still passed out, they talk really quietly between themselves.

She’s somewhere between asleep and awake when sudden chill wakes her up - right behind her knees. She gasps into her pillow - she doesn’t want to wake anyone up.

Afsaneh’s voice is soft behind her. “Sorry, my toes are  _ freezing _ .”

Pippa goes to roll over, then realizes that she’s been lying on a huge part of the covers. Whoops. She shuffles, shifts as much of the blanket she can over Afsaneh while keeping under them herself. “Why didn’t you say anything?” she giggles softly, and traps Afsaneh’s feet between her calves, wraps her arms around her and pulls Afsaneh’s back toward  “Warmer?”

“I don’t know,” Afsaneh says, pulling Pippa’s arms to her chest. “You looked...super out of it. I didn’t want to disturb you.”

Pippa tsks quietly, almost playfully. She’s so silly when she does stuff like this. “What else is cold?”

“My neck.”

Pippa finds the cold spot with her cheek, breathes in deeply. Afsaneh wouldn’t be allowed to do this in the field, but at the Academy, they still have the option to scent their clothes when they come out of the replicator. She always picks something flowery - jasmine, maybe, or rose. Or both. “Better?”

Afsaneh hums, more content. She always braids her hair when they sleep, perhaps out of courtesy to Pippa. Pippa wonders if she does it when she sleeps alone - which neither of them have done in a while, she realizes. Pippa adjusts the hair, looping it over Afsaneh’s shoulder.

“Just wake me up,” Pippa giggles. Afsaneh’s feet are beginning to feel warmer. She shifts her legs so that they’re back between another warm spot.

Afsaneh makes another contented noise, and Pippa tucks the covers under the other girl, just a little more. “Would you have done that to me?”

“Done what?”

“Woken me up if I was sleeping on the covers.”

“No way,” Pippa giggles against her neck. “I’m a covers ninja. You have no idea.”

* * *

Kat and Gabe are lying on their sides, facing each other, as they have for about half an hour though, and though they’ve been sleepily sliding their hands up and down each others’ thighs, Kat’s eyes open - sudden, silent - when Gabe’s fingers hook briefly into her underwear (she’s still wearing it, which is a pleasant enough surprise - often, she’s not).

Her mouth is close enough to his to kiss him, if she wants. “That’s not nice. They’re right there,” she says instead, at a volume that she knows by experience that they won’t hear, especially if they’re giggling to themselves like they are now.

“They’re driving me insane,” Gabe says, and does lean forward and kiss her, just a little. He’s definitely not wearing underwear. “They’re like this  _ every day _ .”

She bites his lip a little, stilling his hand with hers. “Not our business. You know how Pippa can be.”

“Please tell me I’m not the only one who sees this.”

He’s wearing her resolve down fast, but it’s not like she’s trying  _ that _ hard to resist him, not when he’s naked and in her bed like this. She takes his hand, pulls it up to her breast slowly, quietly. “You’re the only one this invested.”

He strokes over her nipple with his thumb. “You like it.”

The reason why she keeps doing this to herself is because it’s so damn good and - shockingly - doesn’t cost her anything.

“Hm, I guess investment is hot on you.” He wants to say something else then - she knows it. Instead, she clears her throat. The giggling on the other side of the room stops. “Gabe and I are going to the shower. He’s naked.”

She can also feel his erection poking her in the thigh, but she says nothing about this.

More giggling. They’re already facing the wall, but Kat watches Pippa put her hand over Afsaneh’s eyes and wonders, briefly, how either of them have so much self control. What would life be like if she didn’t look at sex the way she did?

“Have fun, guys!” Pippa sing-songs. She and Afsaneh dissolve into giggles again, and Kat takes Gabe’s hand and leads him to the bathroom.

* * *

With Kat and Gabe gone, they can be a lot louder. They laugh until their stomachs hurt, and then Pippa shakes her head. “To be young and in love,” she says, throwing her arms above her head.

Afsaneh’s warm now, so she takes a familiar position, flopping over so that her chin rests on Pippa’s stomach, looking up at her. “Are they finally in love now?”

Pippa shrugs. “They’re definitely  _ in love _ .”

“But...love has a lot of definitions in Standard,” Afsaneh suggests.

“I think so. He hasn’t stopped looking. She hasn’t stopped touching, but they always come back together.”

Afsaneh shakes her head, making Pippa giggle and grab her stomach. “I couldn’t do that.”

Pippa smirks. “Stop looking and touching?”

“No,” says Afsaneh, tossing her hair, just a little bit haughty. Pippa laughs again. She’s not heard those stories yet, but she’s sure she will some day. “In-between with someone like that. Could you?”

Well,  _ that _ gives her pause. Pippa’s never been like that with someone, but how is she supposed to know how it is if she doesn’t try?

“Maybe if ze was honest,” she says, falling into using Iman’s pronouns because it’s just  _ easy _ , “and it made ze happy...then yes? Perhaps? What?” Afsaneh’s looking at her kind of strangely.

Afsaneh blinks. “Um. Nothing. I just realized something. It’s not a big deal. Brunch?”

* * *

Kat braces her hands against the wet shower wall and rests her head against them. Gabe’s driving into her hard from the back, and she’s bumping into her fingers, just a little, bent over at the waist, but it’s not enough to hurt. Definitely not enough to tell him to stop.

She arches her back a fraction - just enough to where she knows she can take him in just a little more.

It’s ridiculous how such a small movement can make him moan  _ like that _ .

He thrusts hard enough to where it does hurt a little, and Kat balls her hands into fists to give herself a little more space between her head and the wall.

He puts one hand on her back. “Oh, fuck, sorry.”

“Don’t apologize to me unless you want to stop,” she hisses, and she spreads her legs just a little so that she can get her hand - right - where she needs it.

God, she’s still sore from last night - it’s so wild that she can still feel like this. She drives her hips back with each thrust, and his grip tightens on her back - it’s sweet, that he tries to warn her, though there’s no point. Kat can’t imagine living in a time when there wasn’t birth control.

She can’t reach back and grab him, nor can she really say anything - she’s pretty far gone herself. She leans into her fist and moans his name, hot water dripping around them, him inside her just the way she likes, and she’s  _ so close to the edge _ .

He groans, falls into her a little, and she can feel him shaking behind her. A few more strokes, and she’s there too, riding out her pleasure as he wraps an arm around her waist.

She sinks to her knees and turns around, legs sprawled out on the floor, looking up at him. “Fuck,” she pants.

“Yeah, we’re not going to be able to take another one of these showers for like three months, so I’m glad that we used it up on this,” Gabe says. Kat rolls her eyes, and he switches the shower to sonic, holds out a hand to help her up.

“So, are we going to talk about the possibility that you get off on our friends being into each other?”

“That’s not what’s happening at all. The tension is...oh, come on. It’s not just me.”

“Maybe it’s there, but maybe they haven’t realized it.” She lifts her hair a little bit to spread it, and he’s staring at her. “What?”

“So uh, when do we help this along?”

Kat rolls her eyes. “That’s only going to make things worse.”

“But they’re going to do something about it, aren’t they?”

Kat shrugs. Gabe rolls his eyes. “Can we bet on this at least?”

“Whether or not they’re going to...what? Admit their feelings for each other?”

“Fuck.”

Kat laughs. “Why does that word feel so wrong when it’s about them?”

Gabe considers. “Fine. Do  _ something _ .”

The sonic’s nearly dried them now, and Kat steps into his space and wraps her arms around his neck. “Now I know your mama taught you to place bets better than that.”

“You’ve still never played my mother in poker.”

“That’s because I value myself.”

“You’ve played me and done just fine.”

There’s a mark on Gabe’s chest, one she left with her mouth. It’s fading now, from a few days ago, but Kat kisses it anyway. “The fact that you think you’re better at poker than your mother means you’re delusional.”

“We can keep it simple: will they or won’t they?” Kat shakes her head. “So you agree. You think they’re going to do something.” Kat rolls her eyes in response, and Gabe’s eyes light up. “I knew it. How soon?”

Kat frowns. “I almost don’t want to say anything about it. I don’t want to jinx it, you know? My great-grandmother used to say it was something like...counting before it hatches.”

“Counting what?”

“I don’t know. Something that hatches.”

“Baby chicks take around three weeks to hatch,” says Gabe. “I say one month.”

“Three months,” says Kat. Gabe raises an eyebrow. “We have finals in a month. Everyone’s brain shuts down after finals. And everyone knows that people get together during the first part of the semester when there’s nothing to do. Shake on it?”

But Gabe’s got that glint in this eye.

“I’m not bending over again. I’m still a little sore from training yesterday, and the pain’s just starting to set in.’

She grins when Gabe sinks down on his knees in front of her, parting her thighs with his thumbs. “Delusional, maybe,” he says, kissing that spot just inside of her knee that makes her twitch. “But not unreasonable.”

* * *

“I have bad news,” Afsaneh opens, when Chris joins her.

“I know. We pretty much only have heavy conversations in this particular cafe.”

“We can go somewhere else.”

“Nah, I like the compartmentalization happening here. What’s up?”

Afsaneh pushes her hair behind her ear. “Um, we can’t have sex anymore.” Chris’ mouth twitches. “Stop it.”

“I didn’t do anything! But--”

“ _ What? _ ”

She gives him smug moments like this one because he only pulls them so sparsely. Also there are few people in the world who know her as well as he does. “Why, uh, why do we have to stop?”

“Chris--”

He leans in, just a little conspiratorial. “Is the sex bad?”

Afsaneh rolls her eyes. “No. I have feelings. There. Are you happy?”

“For me?”

“ _ God _ , no.”

“For who, then?” he asks, innocent-looking enough.

Afsaneh hates him. She really hates him. “For Pippa,” she says quietly.

When he doesn’t say anything, she looks up and finds him smiling. “How did it feel to say that out loud?”

Good. Strange. A relief. Terrifying. “A lot.”

Chris grins and sips his tea. “I’m here for you, you know. If you need anything.”

“I hate this.”

“I don’t envy you. Feelings are rough. But--”

“But what?”

“She’s a nice girl.”

She’s so stupid, especially now that she’s said it out loud. She can’t help smiling. “She really is.”

"So what are you going to do about it?"

"I don't know."


End file.
